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~i'm sick and tired of chasing things that will never work... but i think it's time for me to be realistic about the people in my life. i can't change the way they feel.
~i don't like my job very much. i'm sure no one saw that coming. but really it's sooo boring, constant outgoing calls about things that do not even matter. and everyone who works with me is pretty old. i'm talking like your grandma might be working there with tara and me. i want to be around some people my age... i'm going to apply with tara at her old job. i could work during the days with this job, and make more cash. ~i'm going to get a car here soon. i've talked to colleen and she gve me some ideas. so by the end of the summer i'm going for it. ~i need a car because by the end of the summer i'm going to get an apartment. since i'm not going back to xavier i need a place to live when i'm in school. at this point, i really don't care where i live or whatever. just as long as i'm in the middle. that way i can be close to work, school, my family, and living with my friends. i can live at home for the rest of the summer though. i can just tell i'm making my family mad. my parents are really being ridiculous when it comes to me going out on the weekend, like giving me a guilt trip and everything. i just feel like it's time to get out. ~i'm going to have to get my degree in something else besides nursing, and then go on a fast track program to get my nursing degree. no big deal really. that way i can at least get a job when i graduate, start to pay off some loans, and work towards my nursing degree. it will all work out though. ~i'm sorry about the way that tara's birthday went down. it really was a big misunderstanding that happened to take place on tara's 21st. i never want to hurt my friends, and i know tara was hurt. but we talked and i explained some things and i think it's ok now. i'm just glad that we can all move on. ~i have been sorta talking with keri. all i can do is hope that some day we'll be ok. i know she's hurt though, but really i think that we can work it all out if we just talk. ~i need not give my phone number out to tow truck drivers... it's a starting point, i know... ~tomorrow starts my diet. i'm worried... and i have eating issues anyways, so i think before it gets out of hand and i gain a bunch of weight , i should just diet. i've got serious problems though. messed up in the head as far as gaining weight goes. so tomorrow i'm starting to run, not outside though. those cicadas scare the crap out of me. one was on me in kristin's car, and we were on the highway. i screamed and cried until she pulled over, and then ran all around because i was so freaked out. they're horrible... i want them dead, and i don't care if they're only 4 years younger than me. it doesn't matter. ~las vegas... 44 days!! and what happens in vegas stays in vegas, just like mt adams... ~i'm going to the kenny chesney concert... pretty pumped about that :) ~FLORIDA!!!! YES!!!! <and that's about all i got.... peace |
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